This blog is the second in a series on Christian struggles.
Why do people look at porn? What’s their motivation? Is it to simply satisfy a sinful urge, or is there something deeper?
Through this blog article, and its sequel, I trust that the Holy Spirit will provide hope to those caught in a cycle of porn, and understanding to those who’ve graciously escaped.
When you hear the word porn what do you think of? A teenage boy hiding away in his bedroom, looking at images and videos of barely clothed women on a screen, between his homework and bedtime? A middle-aged man in an unhappy marriage staying up late to watch DVDs showing actors and actresses having sex, while his wife lies sleeping in bed? What about females—do girls and women look at porn? Are you sitting in a seemingly ‘righteous’ seat of judgement over ‘dirty little boys’ and ‘dirty old men’, or are you truly grieving at such thoughts?
For our own benefit, before we go any further, we must take a couple of steps back and think about a basic question regarding this subject—what is porn?
‘Pornography’ is defined in the Oxford Dictionary as: ‘Printed or visual material containing the explicit description or display of sexual organs or activity, intended to stimulate sexual excitement.’ It comes from the Greek word porneia, which means ‘fornication’ and which itself is derived from the Greek word pernaō, meaning ‘to sell off’—it’s a surrendering of sexual purity, and promiscuity of any/every type.
Now, what does God think of fornication, and of fornicators themselves? Maybe you think you’re ‘OK’, as long as you aren’t committing the actual act of sexual intercourse with another? Please slowly read these words from Jesus: ‘You have heard that it was said, “You shall not commit adultery”; But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart’ (Matthew 5:27–28, NASB). Even if you look at someone, whether you’re alone in your bedroom staring at a screen, or walking to school, or sitting in work, and you have a lustful thought about someone, you’ve committed adultery in God’s sight.
Maybe you’re a young Christian, or even an older Christian, and you’re genuinely seeking God’s will. Please know that His will is not mysterious; it’s not something He takes pleasure in continually hiding from you. He’s revealed His will already through the Scriptures—His breathed-out words. He wants sexual immorality in all of its blatant and subtle forms put to death. He wants it wholly slain, not played with at all: ‘Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these the wrath of God is coming’ (Colossians 3:5–6, ESV). Additionally, please read these words found in 1 Thessalonians 4:1–5 (ESV):
Finally, then, brothers, we ask and urge you in the Lord Jesus, that as you received from us how you ought to walk and to please God, just as you are doing, that you do so more and more. For you know what instructions we gave you through the Lord Jesus. For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honour, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God [emphasis added].
What’s God’s will for your life? You want to obey Him? You could start by closing that magazine and burning it. What about closing down that website on your device, getting on your knees and pleading for His mercy. He wants you to turn your lustful eyes and mind away from your classmate/work colleague/neighbour/person on the screen whom you’re committing mental adultery with, and look to Him in His Word, through which He cleanses you (Ephesians 5:26). He wants you to stop dishonouring Him as you worship at the idol of sex and sinful pleasure.
Maybe you’re thinking this is too hard; that it’s all hopeless. In this post I’ve tried to lay what I think is a necessary foundation on which we can build in the next post on hope and the path to lasting joy.
